So, in an attempt to break the staring contest of an impass with my demotivation I did some shopping. Using the wonderfully functional Used Books section on my employer's website, I managed to acquire a small out of print cookbook entitled Everybody Loves Meatloaf.

What a score!

This book is incredible. I thought I was alone, but this woman is dedicated. I didn't know anyone could love meatloaf as much as myself, but dammit she sure does. Here are the first few paragraphs of the introduction:

"My maternal grandmother made a very fine meatloaf. In fact, she made many good meatloaves, and took great pride in the preparation and serving of each one. Meatloaf-making was my first home-cooking lesson. Grandma taught me to mix gently, to pat smoothly, and to tend to the loaf carefully during baking. Over forty years later, as I write this book, I realize that she was talking about a lot more than meatloaf.

The modern meatloaf, like other widely loved foods such as pizzas, pastas, and burgers, has expanded its horizons well beyond the traditional definition. The new meatloaf may be chicken or turkey, salmon or shrimp, or may not even have any meat in it at all! This book is a celebration or all meatloaves, old and new, meat or not.

After years of being held in high esteem in the American food world, meatloaf fell into disfavor during the last decade [80's - ed]. It became the butt of school cafetaria jokes, and it was the centerfold of gluey gravy-stained diner menus. Meatloaf was relegated to the kitchen closet, and rarely discussed in polite culinary company.

It is good news indeed that meatloaf has lately made a comeback! And why not? It has all the right stuff for the way we cook today - easy to make and serve, very versatile, economical, nutritionally correct, usually good hot or cold, and loved by practically everyone.

Depending upon the occasion, meatloaf can be a culinary masterpiece, or it can be a flavorful everyday menu staple. In my view, it is both. There are loaves for celebrations - say, a rich patelike loaf with some mellow red wine. And then there are loaves to brighten the most mundane days - hearty slices of ground meats bound together with good breadcrumbs and topped with ketchup and bacon.

In researching this book, I found that nearly everyone has a meatloaf story, ranging from a gravy incident with a sibling to a romance over a little shrimp mousse and champagne on New Year's Eve. In addition, nearly everyone I know has a meatloaf recipe, but very few have more than one. So, because we can never get enough of a good thing, here are a few more meatloaves to add to your collection, as well as a repertoire of poultry, seafood, and vegetarian loaves, all designed to give you a whole new view on this American classic."

Can ya dig it? This book rocks. There are over 100 recipes of "loaves and fixin's". Some of the ones that really piqued my interest were Argentinian Steakloaf, Osso Bucco Loaf with Gremolata Tomato Gravy, Basque-Style Meatloaf, Turkey and Shiitake Loaf with Sherry Gravy, Dirty Rice Loaf, Casino Clam Loaf, Southwest Tuna Melt Loaf, Garlic, Grits and Greens Loaf and Deviled Broccoli Squares. They should include a crack pipe and twelve step program with this book. It is just that good. I haven't even mentioned anything from the Suaces and Sides section.

Ms. Barnard has completely outdone herself. This is one chockablock full little book. Besides all the recipes, she includes tips and tricks and some really helpful hints. And that doesn't even include the chapter entitled Advanced Meatloaf.

You may have noticed how quiet it is here. Well, I have hit a minor wall as it comes to writing. I have three or four things percolating, but I am generally uninspired.

Don't worry, I will be back soon.

I made some 'loaf this fine evening.

This evening's Jerk Pork Meatloaf is brought to you by Jack Welch, Gabriel Byrne and Rupert Holmes.

Recipe and photos to follow.

Best Western is on to me!!

They have changed their photo spread related to the Lamplighter in London, ON.

The only picture of Smitty's is some staged shot of the chef and faux-customer (see below).

No more wagon wheels and little Santas.

I am still at a loss. Where is the love?

How am I going to make 'Jerk Pork Meatloaf'? My ideal would be to have the 'loaf be slightly jerk flavoured while having a strong fragrant glaze. I need some help here folks.

What are the predominent flavours of Jerk and how do I get them in a 'loaf? Let's hear it.

Just a heads up. Caribou and Moose 'loaf recipes will hopefully be coming soon, but remember kids, only love can break your heart.

Wanted!

I need some help. I was thinking of making a 'Jerk Pork Meatloaf' and was wondering is anyone had any ideas.

Email me or leave a comment.

I know. I have been very remiss in posting lately. It has almost been a week and the last post said I was going to post the results from the pre-packaged taste off.

Sorry. The html tabling of the results has annoyed me enough to throw up my hands and swear. Loudly.

It will arrive soon. Please have patience. Until then, here is a little taste.

I made meatloaf!

Last Thursday was Tex-Mex night at mi Casa, so here is...

Peter's Chicken Mexi-Cali Loaf
A Mexican inspired loaf. Tastey, fragrant and sure to be a crowd pleaser. Quick and easy, this is the one to try (inspite of the picture).


Ingredients

2 lbs lean ground chicken
1 large onion, chopped fine
1 jalapeno, chopped fine
1 can refried beans
1/2 cup breadcrumbs
1/2 cup salsa
1/2 cup chili sauce
3 tbsp chili powder
1 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp pepper

Glaze

1 cup Green salsa
2 tbsp citrus hot sauce
3 tbsp honey

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees.

2. Mix all ingredients in a large bowl.

3. Pour mixture into loaf tin.

4. Bake for 1 hour. Mix glaze ingredients in small bowl.

5. Remove loaf from oven and pour glaze mixture in loaf tin, covering loaf evenly.

6. Bake for 30 minutes. Remove from oven. Let stand for 1o minutes; slice and serve with additional green salsa.

Since no one answered my call I was forced to use extreme measures in my unbiased rating of pre-packaged meatloaves (yes, that is the plural form).

I shanghaied the other members of my irregular Video Game Club.

I re-heated, we ate, they rated.

I will post the results later.

So I have thought long and hard about this and I don't want anyone to convince me otherwise. You heard me. My mind is made up so you can take your dissent and shove it.

Yup, I am going to taste test all the prepackaged frozen meatloaf entrees that I can find.

So, who's with me?

Here is my list so far:

Michelina's Comfort Classics Meatloaf and Gravy with Mashed Potatoes
"Michelina's Meat loaf is made with juicy ground beef. It's cooked with Worcestershire sauce, onions and red peppers, and served in its own gravy with mashed potatoes. Just-a one bite and you'll see why everything Mama makes is so perfecto!"

Stouffer's Meatloaf
"A tasteful combination of two meat loaves glazed with catsup, baked and smothered in a rich, brown gravy. Served with a green bean and carrot medley and a satisfying portion of Stouffer's creamy mashed potatoes."

PC Fully Cooked Beef Meat Loaf
"Pre-sliced, homestyle meat loaf prepared with our own President's Choice Ketchup. Ready in 16 minutes."

LeanCuisine Meatloaf and Whipped Potatoes
"Hearty meatloaf delicately seasoned with onions and green peppers, in a savory gravy with tomatoes. Accompanied by creamy whipped potatoes and a dash of paprika." NOT OFFERED IN CANADA

Swanson Hungry-Man Meatloaf Dinner
NOT OFFERED IN CANADA

Does anyone know of any others???

'Delicious all-beef baked to a peak of flavours' was what caught my eye. It took a while. I must have been pouring over the seven page 8.5x17 full colour laminated menu for ten minutes.

"This place has got to have meatloaf," I thought to myself. "It says 'All Your Favourites! All Day Long!' on the sign out front."

That's when I saw it. It would be too cliche to say out of the corner of my eye. It was more like it was smack dab in front of me on one of those acrylic table sign holders. 'Early Bird Dinner Specials (3-7 pm)' and right below it 'Homestyle Meat Loaf'.

"Waiter, I'm ready to order!!"

This was the auspicious beginning to my meal at Smitty's in London, ON.

Smitty's Family Restaurants seem to be a chain of aneurysm inducing kitsch factories first founded in Alberta, but it was attached to my hotel so why not. Kinda like Denny's but Canadian.

Mine was attached to the Best Western Lamplighter in London. The Best Western was pleasant. They gave me a King Suite for the price of Queen Regular so I can't complain. But Smitty's could only be described as a zit protruding from a pleasant mid-market hotel.

Smitty's is that oddly placed rotunda on the right. What the hell they were thinking no one knows. Inside was much worse. The interior was wood panelled and most of the lighting was provided by miniature wagon wheel chandeliers.


It wasn't the most tempting of dining establishments, but as I said it had a lot going for it. It was attached to my hotel.

Back to the narrative, I had just ordered the early bird dinner special meatloaf when it had hit me.

"Crap! What have I done," I thought. Everything else listed on the specials menu had been represented on the normal laminated dinner menu except the meatloaf. No meatloaf sandwiches, no dinner entree meatloaf, not even meatloaf and eggs for breakfast. It's like the menu had just gone into some sort of meatloaf twelve step program and come out dry and born again.

"I am in a franchise eatery that only serves meatloaf 4 hours a day and that is on the discount menu. I am soooo screwed." That is when my server reminded me of the soup and salad bar and off I went.

You see, Smitty's Early Bird Dinnner Specials appeared to have been created by some wholesaler turned restauranteur. Here is what the small print said,

All Smitty's Early Bird Dinner Entrees come with the following:
Unlimited soup and salad bar, fresh baked rolls, daily vegetable, choice of potato, dessert of the day & a bottomless cup of your choice of coffee, tea or soft drink.

Even on paper that seems like a lot of food. You should have seen the plate.

I moseyed over to the soup and salad bar and helped myself to a half cup of what turned out to be the blandest Cajun Corn Chowder I have ever tasted and heaping plate of greens with pickled vegetables and fresh cucumber and tomato topped with a small amount of French dressing. I also grabbed a fresh baked roll before tucking in.

Before I knew it, my ginormous square plate arrived. Filling every ounce of space was:

• a slice of meatloaf covered in sauteed onions and drizzled with gravy
• a large scoop of really creamy mashed potatoes also drizzled with gravy
• a really big pile of green beans glistening with butter and tossed with steamed peppers and carrots

Immediately, I dove into the 'loaf, breaking off a healthy fork full, making sure I captured a couple of onions and a smear of gravy. As it hit my tongue I instantly knew; yup, the answer came to me. 'What answer?' you ask. The answer to the question, "How can a franchise restaurant afford to make meatloaf everyday in hopes of selling some during an exclusive 4-hour window?", of course.

What I put into my mouth looked like meatloaf. It was a rectangular slice of ground meat that had been baked with a mixture of spices. It smelled like meatloaf. Hell, I would say that every single one of my senses except for taste would have judged it to be meatloaf.

But if I had closed my eyes before placing that succulent morsel into my gob, my brain would have announced something else completely. It had been a very long time since I had tasted Salisbury Steak. A very very long time, but not long enough to forget that distinctive flavour.

I don't know how they did it. I could hazard a guess why, but how still alludes even my imagination. Somehow the head cook at Smitty's in London, ON uses his Salisbury Steak mixture (which is on the regular menu) to concoct some sort of meatloafy substance.

And I ate it.

I had meatloaf last night for dinner!

More to follow.

The amount of times I have joked about Web Cafes being the growth industry of Toronto (a long walk down Bloor West is the prime example) makes me forget how rare they can be outside of the Big Smoke.

My hotel has no internet access. Well, that is not exactly true. My hotel only has WiFi access, so if you forgot to bring your own computer you are screwed. Too modern I guess.

Reporting from London, this is your faithful host signing off.

Existentialism is about as much fun as depression.

I hate leaving NFLD.

So what does meatloaf have to do with Newfoundland? Very little I'm afraid. Newfoundland is a British colony. It still, strangely enough, holds dear to its well formed isolationist roots.

But it still can throw you for a loop now and again.

Today was that day, but I am sure you bright readers already figured that out.

My trip home has been filled with booze, friends, fatty food, and sun. Some of these are strange. Some are not. But most of all, my trip has been filled with meatloaf... er people. I have reacquainted or met so many interesting people.

This evening I met Maioway (I hope that is right), a sixteen year old kid who happened to be walking home the same direction and time I was. He was alive, not afraid to walk or talk with an old foggie like myself, just trying to get home at 3 in the morning.

Maioway has lived in St. John's his entire life. He grew up here. He loves the place and identitifies as a Newf. But like every Newf, he wants to see the big city. He really wanted to know what Toronto was like. I told him.

He got it all. He liked it all, but he had one question...

"What exactly is racial profiling?"

He figured it out, after I told him, but he didn't really understand. He was still excited. His only response was, "Idonknow, everyone's been so nice to me"

Maioway was a black kid who was raised in Newfoundland. He loved the place, but wanted to leave for experience's sake.

He is just more concerned about Newfie jokes than racism.

Last night at a party, I asked a bunch of my friends from high school if they remembered her. Even with the prompting of a first name, none of them could.

Are we all going senile?

I am going to have to track down my yearbook.

Last night, very late, while reading a book, her name came to me.

I think it was Karen.

I am still working on the last name.

What is with the Newfoundland diaspora? I know it is huge. I know it is widespread. But why is it that, when I sitting alone in the Maple Leaf Lounge in Pearson, minding my own business, enjoying a beer and reading quietly, am I acosted by someone I went to high school with?

I know it is a small world. I am the first to admit that Newfoundlanders get into to more cracks, crevices and hard to reach places then roaches, but come off it.

She was nice, we knew common people, but I couldn't remember her name and I think she could tell. That is always awkward and painful. We chatted pleasantly about me being a bad friend and pregnant peers and she ran off to catch a flight.

Maybe I will bump into her in St. John's, too.

(I still can't remember her name)

Bruce Campbell has made my life really busy, so I haven't updated very regularly. I will update soon. Off to Newfoundland for a wedding tomorrow. Maybe someone will serve meatloaf.

A few days ago, Athena mentioned her idea about a 'Thanksgiving Loaf', which was basicly a turkey meatloaf with a vein of dressing (stuffing to you mainlanders) running through it. On Saturday, I was all keyed up when I was leaving work from selling roughly 1000 copies of Harry Potter combined with seeing almost every child in the free world get excited about reading. So needless to say I was jazzed and needed an outlet. Making a meatloaf seemed to be as good an idea as not and since I had been negligent in that area I felt it was my duty to try something new. So without further ado, here is:

Stuffed Turkey Loaf with Sweet Potato Frosting

2lbs lean ground turkey
2 med carrots, grated and chopped
1 lrg onion, chopped
2 cups mushrooms, chopped
2 cloves garlic, chopped
1/2 cup cream of celery soup, undiluted or milk
2 tbsp chili sauce or ketchup
1 tbsp dried rosemary, ground
1 tsp black pepper, ground
all-purpose flour

Dressing/Stuffing
1 box Pepperidge Farms Stuffing
1 stalk of celery
1 small onion, chopped
2 tbsp savory, ground

Sweet Potato Frosting
1 lrg sweet potato (I mean large, use two if you are unsure)
1 tbsp brown sugar
1 tsp cinnamon, ground
salt and pepper

Directions

1. Preheat oven at 375F.

2. Combine carrots, onions, mushrooms, garlic, rosemary and pepper in large bowl. Add turkey, soup and chili sauce. Mix evenly with hands.

3. Lay out large sheets of wax paper and dust with flour. Lay turkey mixture out and roll flat until about an inch thick with rolling pin or bottle (I personally use a full bottle of Jameson's). Width should equal length of loaf pan. (see below)



4. Mix your dressing according to instructions on the box or make it from scratch (I sauteed onions and celery which I combined with my box dressing. I also added savory to make it taste more like traditional Newfoundland dressing). Distribute dressing/stuffing evenly over tukey mixture leaving small area at either end uncovered. (see below)


5. Roll turkey mixture into a loaf as you would roll a jelly-roll. Lightly press to connect join at end. (see below)



6. Place roll in loaf tin and bake for 1 hour or until internal temperature reaches 180-190F.

7. Boil sweet potato in salted water until soft. Drain (you may want to reserve some of the water for a gravy base) and mash. Add cinnamon, 3/4 tbsp brown sugar and salt and pepper to taste.

8. Take meatloaf out of oven when cooked. Cover top of loaf with uniform coating of potato mixture. Sprinkle remaining brown sugar on top of loaf. Broil for 5-10 minutes or until sugar begins to caramelize. Remove meatloaf from oven. (see below)


9. Let stand for 10 minutes. Slice and serve. (I served it with mushroom gravy - see below)

A few things I learned were, firstly, make your dressing/stuffing a little drier than you think as it absorbs a lot of the meat juices. Secondly, it is important to get that internal temperature up because, although it is a meatloaf, it is still poultry. And finally, it may be a little better with a brown sugar glaze instead of sprinkled sugar.

All in all, a pretty good recipe that is easy to modify to your ideas about Thanksgiving. Although, in making it it reminded me of an old joke whose punchline is "Wrecked 'im? Damn near killed 'im!".

I made a new meatloaf on Saturday. I will post a quick recipe and photos!! by Wednesday. It is an answer to Athena's request for Thanksgiving loaf.